Screw plans.

i hate this.

Holy crap.

That just happened.

Be proud of me, very proud.

So many things can turn around in an instant.

And that's what Happened today.

Mom, Jon, and I went to Vulcan.
Then by tacobell after we discovered there is NO chinese place open on a Sunday after 7.


It was the cutest thing ever.
:D
gosh, I love you, Jon Davis.

From the top of the hill, I'll roll down.

Friday afternoon to like..10 minutes ago I was on top of everything. This includes relationships, controlling my eating, being a good friend, a good daughter, and just happiness in general.
9 minutes ago, I tripped up and started falling down the hill. I didn't think the hill was this big.

I'm not a good daughter anymore because I brought my clothes up a little too late.
I'm not a good sister because I just annoy my siblings.
I'm not a good friend because I don't care about them.
I'm not a good girlfriend because I told him I didn't wanna do a certain things and I chose the wrong choice that he gave me to choose.

Now. This is how I see it.
I'm a good daughter because I brought my clothes up.
I'm a good sister because I try to help.
I'm a good friend because I care about them more than I should.
I'm a good girlfriend because I try to understand and I try to stand up for myself and my opinion. I'm a good girlfriend because I want to be the best there is and I want to give him what he wants when apparently I just SUCK all together.



Now. Why can't people understand that I'm trying to be nice and considerate. I'm trying to help out.

When did that become such a bad thing?

2/6/09

So how about yesterday was our one year.

Think about that for a second...
okay.
I was just as shocked as you. I mean one year is like 365 days. That's a very long time. And I'm really happy about it. I'm really happy it was with Jon and no one else. I'm really happy about how things are and how they are going. We can bicker sometimes, but as ridiculous as it sounds I think I'm in love. Whether that show to be true or not, I'm gonna believe it for as long as I can. Simply because I really want it to be true. Which might make me get hurt even worse in the end but who knows, maybe if something were to happen I wouldn't get hurt at all. I don't know. I just know that he does have the choice to go when he pleases. And that blows. It's even hard to think about. So I'm not gonna.

This is what we did.
1. After school he and doug picked me up and we went and picked up his mama.
2. We went to see Pink Panther2.
3. We went to California Pizza Kitchen to eat. nomnomnom.
4. We went back to his house and chilled then he gave me my flowers :D (Pink Daisies.)

It was the best night ever.
I love him.
The end.

You know what?

I really honestly don't know what the hell I'm going to do without Jon if he decides to leave me.
























and this scares me more than anything.

Sometimes you have to work with what you have.

Lemme take you through a typical day in my life.

In the morning, I check my phone for any texts, of course, and I find one maybe from Jon that's real sweet or saying goodnight cos I fell asleep. Then I stumble outta bed and grab my robe and head to the bathroom to find that someone is already in it :P. I'll sit on the couch, half awake, and wait for whoever to come out. Then FINALLY he or she comes out and I head in. I warm up the water and take my awesome awakening shower. I get out of the shower and head to my room. Of course, like anyone else, I delay getting read for the longest time only to rush it in the end. I grab something to eat maybe and head off to school but only after I give a text to Jon saying Good morning :).
I arrive at school and sit in my car until the bell rings or Jon shows up. Go to my locker and head to 1st block which is either Myrick or Teacher's aide.

1A-Myrick's: Disection, SWEET. Take a lot of notes and almost slit my wrists with the scapel until the bell saves my life.
1B-Teacher's Aide: File some papers, pass crap out, easy peasy.

2A-Dunn's: 5 Paragraph on symbolism from the Crucible! ALRIGHT! (ish).
2B-Harp's: Oh fun. Typing. Over. AND OVER AND OVER. :P. I hate this.

3A-Roberton's: Oh funfunfun! :D :D :D I love history and Robertson. What could be better?? XD
3B-McDowell's: French 3? what? A new tense? OH YEAHHHH. Let's conjugate crap.

4A-Dance/McDowell's: Dancing? ooo what kind? Modern!? oh yeahhhh. Don't laugh at me :p
4B-McCoy's: What? You have to tell us 5349637856 stories? Sounds good. Oh, we have work too? GROSS. How about we do it by 4's? Thank you Brett Reid. And please, Coach, stop hitting on every girl. And please girls, stop flirting back. I'm about to vomit.

Bell rings and out to my locker I go. Afterwards I go to meet Jon in the hallway to say Goodbye until I see him again or if he comes over later on. Then I basically have to run to the car if I rode with Chelsea but if I drove, I get to take my time :) There's nothing like a slow ride home after a stressful day at school.



Home, now. Awesome I'm just gonna lay down an- "WTF why didn't you do BLAHBLAHLAH..." (Oh great. Parents just love to give you a break, right?) "Okay fine, I'll do it (insert mom or dad here), just lemme sit here for a litt-" "NO. right now." "Fine."
I just love life.





Forreal though, I love my life and it's pretty great most of the times.
I think I'm lucky.